Ten Holiday Songs I Could Do Without Ever Hearing Again

Lest you think the following is a guest post from The Grinch, it is not.

And before you think that I am a Grinch, I assure you I am not. (Well, most of the time.)  I do, however, have a husband that insists on playing Christmas music (yeah, it’s CHRISTMAS music, dammit) the second he wakes up on Thanksgiving. This qualifies me to offer my opinion to you on which songs I could really do without ever hearing again. From my perusal of similar lists around the interwebs, I’m not alone in my distain for the following (in no particular order):

1. The Chipmunks – or anything involving talking, barking animals.
I changed my mind. This list is in order. I really, really, really hate The Chipmunks’ Christmas song. Which, I realize, makes me un-American in many circles. I can accept that.

2. Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer.
I’ve never liked this song. It freaked me the fuck out when I was a child. Forget visions of sugarplums; I’d be concocting dramatic visions of the ER room and my grandparents lying dead.

3. Feliz Navidad
We get that you want to wish us a Merry Christmas already. Really.

4. Santa Baby, by Madonna
Oh, I cannot stand this song. I just can’t. Hate it.

5. The Man with All the Toys, Beach Boys
Most people love the Beach Boys. What’s not to like about them, right? Except for this song.

6. Any Christmas song by Elvis, with “Blue Christmas” at the top of the list.
It must be said: I am not an Elvis fan, a fact that appalls The Husband. (That goes for all Elvises – or is the plural Elvii? – because I am not a fan of Costello, either.)

7. I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

8. Christmas Shoes.
Probably the most depressing as all shit song ever written.

9.

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